I was reading a post the other day about toxic relationships, friends, and how to let go, and when I sat back to examine what the author of the post was saying I realized, I have neither. What the What??? Now honeys, I am a recovering judgmentalist and drama mama! There wasn’t a cause I didn’t defend, an underdog I wasn’t vase lining my face for, An injustice that did not require MY immediate attention and BEST picket line face! I had to be fighting somebody, something or someone! All my life I had to fight, I had to fight my father…my brother…okay clearly we have all seen Color Purple, the point is I was born a warrior, but who do warriors fight when the battle raging is with one’s self? I certainly didn’t want to face myself so everyone else was fair game.
So not to have anything toxic, negative, or a cause that was none of my business or purpose going on whether real or imagined is a big frickin deal! I am proud to say that the work I have been doing with myself over the years is finally paying off, with healthy, loving, compassionate relationships NO MATTER how long or short lived…I give thanks! 2013 it crystallized for me, it has been brewing in me for some time, but this past year I truly discovered unconditional love, how LOVE IS TRULY EVERYTHING! Walking in that truth, basking in its glory, Living in its Majesty, so breathtakingly Beautiful.
To turn that warrior spirit INWARD and letting each and every fight find its origin in SELF LOVE!! I was expending far too much energy on what wasn’t “right” instead of using the energy building the alternative? I think of the time when I was fighting tooth and nail to keep my home, it was missing windows, doors, heat, pipes, just about everything and I was fighting SO HARD to keep a sinking ship no matter the damage it was doing to my Marriage! THE DAY I NOTICED then surrendered, and decided my MARRIAGE was far more important then this house that Jack built, and my husband’s peace of mind was just as important as mine, an opportunity presented itself for the better! I took my energy from the failing and began to build on the alternative! LIFE CHANGER!
My soul has been growing weary of all the post I see about toxic relationships, fake friends, closing ranks, keep your circle tight, being stabbed in the back, just VICTIMS and VILLAINS everywhere! It has become daunting to me, if everyone is closing ranks, suspicious of friends and getting rid of toxicity where will the love flourish? Then I looked at myself and determined I don’t have these issues because I am open, and am loving, and am forgiving, I am compassionate with MYSELF and am no victim, and that extends to others thus producing the relationships I AM, and I desire!
The solution seems to be so simple BE THE FRIEND YOU DESIRE, BE THE LOVE YOU WISH TO SEE, ENVISION LOVE EVERYWHERE IN EVERYTHING IN EVERYONE! I haven’t any toxic relationships because I DECIDED to release the toxins within my own soul! It has everything to do with me and very little to do with others! Happiness is an inside Job! When we take the task of going inward and focusing on the perfected nature in which we created and getting back to our nature then we will attract all we desire, we will attract who we are! BE WHAT WE DESIRE!
In All Things Passionate
Written by: Reah Idris
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